Monday, February 21, 2011

Phone


Can we please just ignore the fact that I haven't blogged since August? Please?

I've encountered a catastrophe of monumental proportions, friends. My phone broke. Let me take you to the scene: I'm sitting at rehearal, blithely unaware of the tragedy that was to ensue, playing a game. Suddenly, and without warning, the screen turned a deathly shade of white. I tried to stay calm...I removed the battery. Still white. I removed the battery and waited several minutes. Still white. Panic began to set in, and I threw my dying phone into the hands of anyone who offered to try to revive it. No luck. And to make matters worse, the phone's functionality stayed in tact...I continued to receive text message, facebook, and email alerts. I just couldn't read them. It was like my phone was crying out for help, and I was powerless to rescue it.

That was Saturday, and I have been phoneless since then. I took the poor carcass into Verizon, where they promised to ship me a new phone--Tuesday. Until then, the nice lady suggested that I revive one of my old phones and activate it. So this morning, I did. I'm now using a zombie phone...a pink Motorola razor, circa 2007. Here are some things that I have learned about 2007 Sara, courtesy of said phone:

1. She was kind of a whore. According to text messages, 2007 Sara was apparently dating about 5 boys. As I recall though, I wasn't exclusively dating any of them. And I certainly wasn't sleeping with them. But still.
2. 2007 Sara loved downloading ringtones. I mean, she freaking LOVED it. She liked to assign ringtones to individuals as well.
3. She was smart enough to download Tetris. Score. She also had some pretty bangin high scores.
4. She loved Dior. She loved Dior enough to make the phrase "J'adore Dior" her banner on her home screen. Could she AFFORD Dior? No. Did that stop her from purchasing it? Doubtful.
5. Apparently 2007 Sara liked to send pictures of herself making faces to her friends. Were camera phones new?

So, while I await the replacement of my Blackberry, you'll find me trying to remember what T9 was like while simultaneously rocking at Tetris. My heartfelt condolences go out to anyone else who has suffered a similar loss.

xoxo

2 comments:

Andy - Instafather said...

I much prefer 2011 Sara, but then again, I wonder what 2015 Sara will say about 2011 Sara when her phone breaks and she's forced to use her ol' Blackberry? That's the question.

P.S. "Kind of" a whore?

Scott said...

I LOVED 2007 Sara. I worked with 2007 Sara and had unlimited candy corn, the Hug Hatch, cutting up on our former boss' 1990s fashions, discussions of the cavalcade of men referenced in Sara's 2007 phone. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...but it was entertaining!